Settling In Gently by R.A.Davis

  What does a family culture of curiosity mean? What does it look like to have shared family interests that lead to real-life learning and skills? What have you observed about what kids do with freedom? So my friend Myra did a cool project for her Masters about unschooling and homeschooling and she kindly let me read her thesis and it has me, as usual THINKING THOUGHTS ABOUT THINGS. Did ya'll know I was homeschooled? Not forever, not from stem to stern. More like, I dropped out of high school and then haunted the basement for two years. I messed around on my brother's weight-lifting set-up, listened to my dad's record collection (Cat Stevens, Simon and Garfunkle, Joni Mitchell on repeat.) I played around on our 1994 desktop computer and used a CD-Rom to learn the anatomy of the human hand and post dramatic poetry to AOL forums. I read my mom's college textbooks from when she taught Freshman English ( Flowers for Algernon , The Rise of Silas Lapham , and Walt Whitman). I...

 So I've been struggling lately.  I knew my anxiety was getting bad when the corners of the internet that are my escape from anxiety? They are causing me more anxiety. Yes, I love going to Twitter or discord to find other people who love the same shows that I do, but what if what I have to say about them is stupid, irrelevant, off topic, too obvious, or too obscure... I should shut up, I should delete my post. Or, I should engage more, be more lively, create original content-- ugh, no! I should do more, I should stop trying so hard, ugh, or try harder or etc etc etc I exhaust myself! I swear I could have imposter syndrome at an imposter symposium. But having my escape get colored with my anxiety was unpleasant enough that it forced me to pay attention. Realizing that there was no corner of my mind that was free from screeching, nails-on-chalkboard anxiety and distress sort of forced me to stop and observe. I swear to god, nearly five years of therapy and I am still often so sh...